Ocean of dharma quote of the week

OVERCOMING GUILT

Guilt is not fundamentally healthy, because it has the quality of condemning whatever happens and not seeing the inspiration or positive aspect in things. Often a guilty conscience comes from self-hatred, constantly condemning oneself. The only way to overcome guilt is by seeing that there is nobody to blame for the chaos or the difficulties in life. Chaotic situations are not punishment, but they are steppingstones. Then you can see the positive within the negative.

>From "Family Karma," Chapter Eleven in Work, Sex, and Money: Real Life on the Path of Mindfulness, forthcoming in 2011 from Shambhala Publications. Edited by Carolyn Rose Gimian and Sherab Chodzin Kohn.

Vickie Howell | Blog: Craft Corps Giveaway Day 13: The Creative Family from Amanda Soule

Vickie Howell | Blog: Craft Corps Giveaway Day 13: The Creative Family from Amanda Soule

Gratitude

I love my dog. She is my first kid, really. She is a huge, gentle beastie. She guards us and keeps us safe. And she loves us in the soulful-eyed, undying way that a dog can. She has taught me a lot about being a Bodhisattva, being present, unconditional, when to wag and when to bark and how much we don't always need words to be connected. I am so grateful that she is sharing her life with me.

Cosleeping - 8 3/4 months

We cosleep with the little monkey. All in all, I love it. My husband and I get creative about our time together and nothing in the world compares to the little one's cherubic face in the morning. We've evolved over the last 8 months - first using a snuggle nest (he was so tiny I was afraid of rolling over on him!), then putting the mattress on the floor (long before he could roll, I wanted to be ready). Now he is almost crawling and I'm not ready to leave him unattended in the room off the bed AND it would be nice to get a little more sleep. I think we wake each other up a lot - I like to shift around a bit and he cries out in his sleep sometimes and I respond when I don't have to because he falls back to sleep without me. And he really doesn't need to breastfeed all night long any more. So, I put the cosleeper back in the bedroom, next to the bed, as a playard. We played in it (well, he was in it, I was outside it) today - playing peek-a-boo and I think he seemed to understand that it was HIS space, and I think that he might have even liked it a bit. He laughed and played and seemed content to coo in it for a while. And tonight he is sleeping in it - so far, so good. Wish us luck!

Tired of Speaking Sweetly ~ Hafiz

Love wants to reach out and manhandle us,

Break all our teacup talk of God.

If you had the courage and

Could give the Beloved His choice, some nights,

He would just drag you around the room

By your hair,

Ripping from your grip all those toys in the world

That bring you no joy.

Love sometimes gets tired of speaking sweetly

And wants to rip to shreds

All your erroneous notions of truth

That make you fight within yourself, dear one,

And with others,

Causing the world to weep

On too many fine days.

God wants to manhandle us,

Lock us inside of a tiny room with Himself

And practice His dropkick.

The Beloved sometimes wants

To do us a great favor:

Hold us upside down

And shake all the nonsense out.

But when we hear

He is in such a "playful drunken mood"

Most everyone I know

Quickly packs their bags and hightails it

Out of town.

From: 'The Gift'

Translated by Daniel Ladinsky

Baby Steps

I had a work meeting this morning. Little Monkey spent the morning with his dad while I was getting ready. I wanted to cuddle with him to say good bye and he made it clear that he was having LOTS of fun with Daddy and clearly wanted him. This is a beautiful thing. I left the house feeling freer to leave than at any point in the last 8 and a half months. Guilt-free even!

My work meeting went well. During the meditation led by a very skilled and spiritually in-tune man, I had a felt sense of my Buddha nature. He led us in a meditation with left hand palm down on the earth and right hand palm up in offering while talking about Buddha sitting under the bohdi tree in his quest for understanding. He invoked gratitude, asking forgiveness, and metta for all living things.

Shoulda Coulda Woulda

I'm pumping right now - and I'm thinking, I should've blogged while pumping this entire time - I'd have at least a million posts give the bajillion times i've pumped since little monkey was born! So here I am, at my second post, second day and I'm "shoulding" all over the place. Deep breath ~ why is it so hard to just be where I am?

What if there were no shoulds, just what is and what i want to do with it?

beginnings ...

Kindness Before you know what kindness really is you must lose things, feel the future dissolve in a moment like salt in a weakened broth. What you held in your hand, what you counted and carefully saved, all this must go so you know how desolate the landscape can be between the regions of kindness. How you ride and ride thinking the bus will never stop, the passengers eating maize and chicken will stare out the window forever. Before you learn the tender gravity of kindness, you must travel where the Indian in a white poncho lies dead by the side of the road. You must see how this could be you, how he too was someone who journeyed through the night with plans and the simple breath that kept him alive. Before you know kindness as the deepest thing inside, you must know sorrow as the other deepest thing. You must wake up with sorrow. You must speak to it till your voice catches the thread of all sorrows and you see the size of the cloth. Then it is only kindness that makes sense anymore, only kindness that ties your shoes and sends you out into the day to mail letters and purchase bread, only kindness that raises its head from the crowd of the world to say it is I you have been looking for, and then goes with you every where like a shadow or a friend. ~Naomi Shihab Nye from The Words Under the Words: Selected Poems